Husband in Cedar Rapids Iowa Wins an Argument
By Bob Doe, The Married Man Show Correpondent
Mark Pollard owns and operates a dry cleaning business that's been in the family for three generations. A rival dry cleaners nearly forced him to declare bankruptcy during a recent economic downturn. Mark's wife Henrietta could not find her cherished two carat diamond wedding ring and bitterly accused her husband of selling it behind her back to keep the business afloat. Mark felt hurt and betrayed by the wrongful charges. They went to counseling. They slept in separate bedrooms. Despite vehement arguments and denials, Henrietta refused to believe her husband. One Friday evening after a hard week's work, Mark returned home to find a plumber fixing the clogged bathroom drain. Inside the drain trap, the plumber retrieved the long missing diamond ring. A contrite Henrietta admitted she was wrong. Mark collapsed to the floor suffering a fatal heart attack. Services will be held at the First Presbyterian Church on Sunday.
Father of Twins Gets a Full Eight Hours of Sleep
By Winston Maverick, Contributing Reporter - The Married Man Show
Earle Simmons of Grassy Bog, Long Island is a fleet mechanic for a major rental car company and the father of nine month old twin girls. Co-workers noticed a grayish discharge leaking from Earle's ears one morning but he dismissed their warnings claiming he had gone swimming the night before. When Earle complained about dizziness after lunch and dropped a rear differential on the floor, the shift supervisor insisted that he visit the doctor. Earle was very surprised to learn his brains were melting from lack of sleep. He went home immediately, ignoring his wife's demand that he fix the garage door, and went to bed. As of yesterday, Earle reportedly has had a full eight hours of uninterrupted sleep and feels great. Apparently he did not need the missing brain cells after all.
Why Can't We Be Friends?
By Tom Thumb, Letter to the Editor - The Married Man Show
I love my wife but I swear, if she turns up the thermostat this winter instead of putting on a damn sweater I'm going to burn down the friggin' house!
